Forgiveness Is My Function

My forgiveness is the means by which the light of the world finds expression through me. My forgiveness is the means by which I become aware of the light of the world in me. My forgiveness is the means by which the world is healed, together with myself. Let me then, forgive the world, that it may be healed along with me.

What does it really mean to forgive the world? Can I forgive something I constructed? In this lesson, I learn that the means is always forgiveness. The means to the goal...what goal? Freedom and happiness. Eternal life.

I cannot forgive something I think is hurting me. I have to let go first of the idea that anything is outside of me or of my mind. I have to accept causation...that I made this world. Then, and only then, is there hope for me.

If I look to someone else to save me, or to help me, or to condemn me...that is still me. I am still doing that. So, I have to accept that first I am MIND. I am all MIND, indeed I am the Mind of God thinking. Next, I accept that if there is conflict in this MIND that I am, it cannot be true. Why? Because God's Mind is never, ever in conflict. The Mind of God is truth, happiness, and joy and total freedom.

Any idea that states that God knows of your conflict is therefore false. He knows only that you are asleep. He has already provided the means for your awakening...but it is up to you to accept this means, apply it and be free. You have to become very certain of this, that you are responsible for your awakening. All the help is there, but you have to use it.

You have A Course in Miracles, use it! It is your ticket out of hell. I knew it the instant I found it. I became so elated, I wanted to tell everyone about it. But, it was just for me. No one else really cared. I was all alone in my dream, looking for the answer. I had been in a depression for six months. I had hit bottom. And there was the answer. In black and white print! I couldn't believe it.

We have been at this for 40,000 years, dear ones. The answer is now here and the means are provided. You only need to apply it, use it, and free yourself of the idea that you could find freedom in bondage.

Forgiveness, I learned the hard way. I had to see that my construct of a world, where someone else can take something from me, where I can lose the things I love, where I can hate or be hated, is all going on inside me. It wasn't easy. I wanted to blame someone else. I was angry at God a lot! I couldn't believe that if I was on a spiritual path that things would not work out my way!

How arrogant I was. I really thought I could manipulate God. It was so insane. But that is what I was thinking at the time. When I finally saw that I had constructed the entire scenario, that I was indeed the problem itself, I died. I had a moment of realization that God is in charge, and I have nothing to say about anything here. I had no control over anything. I only had to surrender and let go. I could not forgive, however. And I knew it. I had to ask Jesus to forgive this whole thing for me. Because to me, it was real.

Guess what? He did. He sent me people who told me it was all okay, and they set me free of my guilt. Only then could I see the perfection of my story and that all of it was a set up, to set me free. I had set it up for my total dissolutionment, and my total freedom.

I failed entirely. And I was so happy! Forgiveness is a result of letting go of the story, of the drama of your own nightmare. I had to forget it, to really release it. But to do that, I had to see the perfection of it, and then see it all worked. I had set my goal of freedom and the drama played out. In the meantime, I was in the throes of my awakening. It was excruciating. But I knew that I had to apply this Course and really do it!

The details of the story are quite irrelevant. What is important is the realization that I am still here in the same body and yet, I woke up! My drama is no different than anyone's really. It involved everyone I loved, including my kids, my ex-husband, my family, and all my dear friends who supported me all the way. I had made a decision to be free and this is how it worked. You must uncover everything that is binding you and let it go! I had to get in there and play out my story and let it undo me, so that I could experience what is real. Was it hard? Absolutely. But in Chapter 4 of the Course, there is a section where Jesus describes that all you have constructed is pain, and THIS NEED NOT BE. He gives total assurance that he knows all about it, and is giving you the solution. It doesn't have to be painful, it's just that is usually is so. Because the emotional attachment to what you have constructed is enormous. It is an ordeal to get out of your dream entirely. You have to fail totally at being a human being. And that is the last thing you want to do.

I learned to let go and surrender every detail of my life to God. I have learned that God really is taking care of me totally. The miracles that have occurred are incredible. It worked and is continually working. I'm just a witness to it. I know I am not alone and that there is light all around me and I am safe in the light of His love for me. This never changes. NEVER.

God is right here giving you everything you need for your awakening. Do you want it? It is inevitable because the cost of sleeping is too great. You are not free now if you have any conflict thoughts in your mind, and you need help. You are in a causal loop of insanity. Admit it and ask for help. You will be given all you need for this awakening. I know because I couldn't do it alone. I needed total help, and I got it.

I am responsible for what I see. I choose the feelings I experience and I decide upon the goal I would achieve. And everything that seems to happen to me, I ask for and receive as I have asked.

This one statement is the key to your happiness.

Love and blessings!